This absolutely broke my heart - not just because it was beautifully written, but because it was beautifully real. You managed to capture both the spirit and the particulars of their estrangement in a very (almost horrifyingly) real way.
And I meant that as a compliment. This was like a good indie movie, full of awkward moments that echo real life. “It’s just…” He’s down to his last hit, but instead of taking it he flicks the butt out onto the snow. “I wish it weren’t so easy to remember all the things about you I despise.”
“That’s a good line,” Sirius answers. “Now, come along, follow it up with a nice dramatic exit.”
That’s when Lily opens the door.
“Alright lads, I’m putting myself to bed now. Sirius, are you staying? Remus, I’ve got the fire ready.”
All of them: Remus, Sirius, James, and poor, sweet Lily all trying to hold it together in a word that was falling apart around them.
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timeasmymeasure
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Date: 2010-12-09 09:52 pm (UTC)And I meant that as a compliment. This was like a good indie movie, full of awkward moments that echo real life.
“It’s just…” He’s down to his last hit, but instead of taking it he flicks the butt out onto the snow. “I wish it weren’t so easy to remember all the things about you I despise.”
“That’s a good line,” Sirius answers. “Now, come along, follow it up with a nice dramatic exit.”
That’s when Lily opens the door.
“Alright lads, I’m putting myself to bed now. Sirius, are you staying? Remus, I’ve got the fire ready.”
All of them: Remus, Sirius, James, and poor, sweet Lily all trying to hold it together in a word that was falling apart around them.
Well done!