It first seemed to me that this was five lovely and very different gifts put together, and each of them would have been enough to make me content. Each is vivid and wonderful.
When I was re-reading I realised how some – first unidentified – longing tied them together, or rather gradually brought Remus and Sirius together. The alternating between the two perspectives worked well, and the tone also changed naturally when it was more about interaction in the group, and that interaction, too, developed by the fourth piece.
I enjoyed the dusk in the last piece through Remus’s senses as well as his awareness of his emotions, and I would have been happy without the detailed kissing scene, too. However, as far as I can tell, you wrote the kissing wonderfully, too, and I particularly liked the part about the cold fingers.
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When I was re-reading I realised how some – first unidentified – longing tied them together, or rather gradually brought Remus and Sirius together. The alternating between the two perspectives worked well, and the tone also changed naturally when it was more about interaction in the group, and that interaction, too, developed by the fourth piece.
I enjoyed the dusk in the last piece through Remus’s senses as well as his awareness of his emotions, and I would have been happy without the detailed kissing scene, too. However, as far as I can tell, you wrote the kissing wonderfully, too, and I particularly liked the part about the cold fingers.